Seeing Yourself in a Mirror

In a recent phone conversation with a family member, I was being baraged by questions about a joint issue we were discussing.   A string of What, How, When and Where questions that came one after the other.

My responses?  Most of them were “I don’t know” and I found myself getting uncomfortable – it felt like an interrigation.   Then suddenly I had one of those ahha moments of clarity.  It was as if I was looking in a mirror hearing/seeing myself do the very same thing to my husband!

Wow! I had a new understanding of what it felt like to be on the receiving end of a string of questions that can’t be answered in the moment, questions that require more investigation or preplanning.

The best part?  My husband was in the room while I was on the phone so he heard my end of the conversation.  When I got off the phone I immediately shared my revelation and he said “Yes!  I was thinking that the whole time you were on the phone!”

What behaviors of yours do you notice mirrored back to you?

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Comfort vs Possibility

In a recent Take Ownership of Your Career Seminar in Raleigh, I asked participants what the positives and negatives were of comfort and possibility. Here is what they shared:

Comfort feels good when things are…

  • Easy
  • Secure
  • Balanced
Comfort does not feel very good when it brings…
  • Stagnation
  • Complacency
  • Laziness
  • Boredom
  • Lack of growth
The positives of possibility are …
  • Excitement
  • Energy
  • Growth
  • Renewal
  • Learning
  • Expansion
Why we sometimes shy away from possibility includes…
  • Fear of failure
  • The unknown
  • Challenge
  • Stress
  • Out of balance

What are your thoughts about comfort vs possibility?

Five Steps to Greater Clarity

If you missed my 5 Steps to Gaining Clarity, Confidence and Direction in Your Career and Life webinar this month, here are some of the highlights:

The five main steps I reviewed were

Self Awareness

Knowing yourself – what your needs are, what makes you who you are, how you are known to others and how you define things like happiness, success and fulfillment is your first step in gaining confidence and direction.

How do you define happiness?

Direction

Choosing which direction you want your life and career to take is often a daunting process.  To get you started, first clarity your intentions.  Intentions are what you want to be, do or have that is within your control.  An example?  To be more present, to become an integral part of my community (do), to achieve greater health (have).

What are your intentions?

Exploration and Action

Thinking and reflecting are important first steps designed to help you see what you want to explore.  The strongest type of explorating is taking action.   Step into what you think you may want to do.  How?  Try a new activity, volunteer on a project, shadow a professional in your field of interest.  The idea is to immerse yourself in the experience, to test the fit.

What will you step into and explore?

Why You Stop

At some point in this process of gaining clarity and direction we may start to doubt our progress and choices or we may feel overwhelmed.   One way to overcome these obstacles and challenges is to shift your thoughts.  First pay attention to them.  Are they filled with “yeah but” and “what if” or “I can’t”?   List the thoughts you are having about this process of transformation and change that are both negative and positive.  For the negative thoughts, see if you also have a corresponding positive thought about the same issue – that is where you can keep your focus.

What is the dominant thought that stops you in your tracks? 

Momentum and Commitment

Our goals and vision are achieved with greater ease when we are able to incrementally work toward them in a consistent way.  One way to maintain momentum is to build your support network.  Learn what support you need and seek it out.  When asking for support, be sure to be specific about what you most want/need.

What support do you most need?

There is much, much more to each of these 5 Steps, this just scratched the surface.  If you would like to go deeper…

  • Purchase my self-study workbook: The Journey From Comfort to Possibility – https://www.stefaniezizzo.com/workbook-journey-from-comfort-to-possibility.  This takes you through all of the 5 steps in much greater detail with information, questions and action steps to keep you moving forward.
  • Schedule a coaching consultation – if you are ready for personalized one-to-one assistance around any (or all) of these 5 steps.  Contact me at stefaniezizzo@yahoo.com or 919-744-9722 to schedule