So…I started exploring what type of work I could do that allowed a bigger picture focus while remaining engaged 1-1 with clients. I started doing some research and having conversations with people and that is when I discovered Coaching.
Life Under Construction
If you have ever done any home renovations (large or small) you probably have experienced some form of the following. As you are reading this, imagine how the same process can apply to your life/career “construction”.
You have a feeling that something needs to change. Maybe you are unhappy with how something flows, or the way your space makes you feel, or some things just feel old and outdated.
- You then begin to imagine what you want. Sometimes that takes a while. You may have an idea of what feeling you want to have but cannot put into words or pictures yet
- So you mull it over, seek inspiration from magazines, Pinterest, or other people
- Now you are beginning to create your visionand so are ready to take action
- You start with deconstruction, decluttering or discarding what you no longer like/want
- As you begin shopping for materials, you may find that your vision is beyond your budget or you can’t find what you want
- Some of you may stop here – though if step 5 has already occurred, you may feel stuck/concerned. Others may forge ahead anyway thinking you’ll figure it out as you go
- Next comes the redesign, construction, changes and additions
- Often, what you actually create does not exactly match your vision, but if you are able to capture the overall feeling you were trying to achieve, you are “complete” (for now anyway…. )
Your process may include additional steps, or maybe you tackle each step in a different order.
And, at any point in your process you may think “what was I thinking, this is overwhelming!”
I share this with you to introduce the idea that any transition is a process.
- It will be exciting and overwhelming
- It will be confusing and clear
- It will be messy before it is beautiful
Increase Your Confidence
So many of those I work with bring up confidence at one time or another as something they want to increase or build.
What is confidence?
Confidence is a sense believing in your own judgment and decisions. Confidence is accepting who you are – your strengths as well as weaknesses. It is a feeling of positivity and empowerment. I believe we all have it within us to be incredibly confident – in fact, I’ll bet you already ARE confident in one or more areas of your life or in certain situations.
What is it about those experiences/situations or moments that brings out your confidence?
Confidence can show up on the outside (in our choices, behaviors and words we use) and on the inside (in our thoughts, beliefs, perspective, assumptions…)
Here is what others might hear: Your voice is clear and strong, you admit when you don’t know something, you ask questions to learn and share when asked to, you say thank you when complemented. Your words are positive (and not timid or self deprecating)
Here is what it may look like on the outside: you enter a room with your head held high and engage others in eye contact. You have a genuine smile on your face. You engage in conversation and connect with others.
Here is what might be going on inside: you believe in yourself and your limitless possibilities. Yes, you still have an “inner critic” judging you occasionally, but you know better and use those negative messages to fuel and challenge you instead of stopping you. You focus on your accomplishments (large or small) as evidence of what works – and you continue to build on that. You feel strong; knowing that there is nothing you can’t handle, learn or overcome.
How do you develop confidence?
Yes, it may seem that some people are born confident, but I believe that anyone can develop theirs. Here are some strategies for doing just that.
- Stretch out of your comfort zone as often as possible – daily if you can. This could be as simple as taking a new route to/from work or as big as trying something you have been fearful of.
- Know, then capitalize on your strengths – when we focus on building our strengths, it gives us a feeling of control and empowerment!
- Remember the moments when you are/have been confident – what were you thinking or believing about yourself?
- Be true to yourself and live your values – when your choices in life/career match what matters most to you, they feel “right”.
- Celebrate your achievements – small and large, every step of the way, instead of focusing on what you have not accomplished yet.
- Treat yourself as you want others to treat you – being kind to yourself shows that you value yourself. When you value who you are, confidence builds.
